Kid's toys aren't just for fun. Toys make amazing rewards that can encourage kids to behave. Toys can be used to encourage general good behavior or you can use them to teach manners, stop phone interruptions and more. The power of kid's toys is utterly amazing when you start using them as leverage for positive behavior.
How Kid's Toys can Encourage Overall Good Behavior
Get three of anything. It can be three pennies, three rocks, three small toys etc... Put the three items in a drawer. Get a plastic cup and put your child's name on it. If you catch your child doing something really nice during the day like using good manners, doing chores, being nice to a sibling or more then pull out one of the three items and place it in your child's cup.
Tell your child that he earned 1 point for his good behavior and compliment him on a job well done! Explain that if he earns 3 point in a day you'll play with him and his favorite toy at day's end. Now if 3 points are too easy, you might want to push it up to 5 or more, depending on your child. When play time arrives, count up the points and if he's earned the right number let him go and get his favorite toy of the day and play with him for at least 30 minutes. You'll find that doing this will improve your child's behavior very quickly and once he learns that you'll play "his way" for 30 minutes he'll be very determined to earn those points every day!
Using Kid's Toys to Teach Manners
If your child has a favorite doll or stuffed animal then you're in luck. You can use his furry friends to help teach him good manners. You'll first need to write down a list of manners that you want your child to learn. Do you want to teach him table manners and help him learn to say please and thank you often? Do you want him to know how to address adults like Mrs. Smith instead of using first names? Do you want to teach him how to say hello and goodbye on the phone and in person? What you teach your child is up to you, but it's a good idea to write a list and practice often till it sinks in.
To teach table manners, have your child bring is favorite stuffed animal or doll to dinner. Ask him how his doll should be sitting and have him place his doll in the appropriate seated position. Then ask your child to do as doll does. Then ask him to tell you what his doll should do if he wants to talk, but has a mouth full of food. Use his doll as an example for every table manner you want to teach your child. You can even have him place a napkin on dolly's lap. You could have your child roll play his "inside" voice talking through his doll and even talk about how dolly could use his manners at a restaurant.
After dinner, head to the family room and sit your child and doll on the couch. Ask your child to have his dolly use the words please and thank you correctly. Roll play with the doll. Encourage your child to have fun with the roll plays to really "show off" his knowledge of good manners. Let him add lib and make things up and ask him to have dolly show you all the good manners that he has. This can be very fun, as well as, quite educational and effective at teaching manners.
Using Kid's Toys to Stop Phone Interruptions
All parents have been on an important phone call and had their child yell, "Mommy!" over and over again. This is annoying for mom and annoying to the caller, but it can be prevented by simply creating a phone call kid's toy box. First step is to get a box. You can choose a pretty handbasket or plastic bin depending on where you want to keep the container. Get a box that's big enough to fit 2 or 3 kid's toys. Then you'll want to choose some toys to put in it. I'd advocate choosing toys that encourage long-time play such as: blocks, pretend play toys, puzzles or anything else that will keep your child's attention.
Discuss, with your child, the importance of letting you have a quiet phone call. Let him know that he now has a special "phone toy box" that can only be opened when you're on a phone call. Show him the box and the special toys inside. Tell him that every time you're on the phone he can play with those toys. Let him know that if he's really good you'll let him choose some new toys every 2, 4 or 6 months (depending on what you decide and your budget) that he can put in his phone toy box.
If he's quiet while you're on the phone then he can keep playing with his special toys until the call is over. If he interrupts, then the toys go back up on the shelf straightaway. If he needs to tell you something "important" you can practice teaching him how to interrupt the nice way. Have him walk over to you and place his hand on your arm or knee and wait till you excuse yourself from the call. Teach him not make noise as he approaches.
As you start using toys as rewards you'll encounter how much fun it can be to teach your child good behavior without having to use negative consequences. These techniques are a win/win for you and your child because each of you will get what you want in the end!
Kids learn best through play so it's important to spend fun time with your child every day. Kim Proulx, a Certified Parent Coach, gives fun ways to use kid's toys to encourage positive behavior.
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